"Sell Me This Pipe Insulation" Wolf of Wall Street Style

"Sell Me This Pipe Insulation" Wolf of Wall Street Style

Posted by BIP - Photo Courtesy of Paramount Pictures on 7th Nov 2022

*This post is for amusement, as our blog posts are usually strictly all business it's good to have some fun once in a while.  If you've haven't seen the movie The Wolf of Wall Street, stop reading and go watch the movie as it is a very interesting and fun flick.

In the film, Leonardo DiCaprio plays convicted stockbroker, Jordan Belfort, and in one scene he is teaching a young group of inexperienced misfits how to become successful junk bond salesmen.  To explain how "selling" works, DiCaprio pulls out a shiny pen and goes around one by one asking everyone to "Sell me this pen".  One by one each new hire takes the pen and attempt an informercial type sale pitch: "This may be the last pen you ever have to buy..."This is the best pen ever made..." etc.  These pitches obviously do not impress Jordan Belfort in the scene.  The correct answer is when one gentleman who works with Jordan grabs the pen and asks him to write his name on a piece of paper.  Jordan obviously cannot do so without a pen, citing the economic principle of supply and demand.

This scene highlights that without first establishing a need for the product, all the fancy selling points are pointless.  You can have the greatest product in the world, but if the customer has no use for your product or doesn't know they need your product its all in one ear and out the other.

We thought it would be fun to ask Mr. Belfort's question with our most popular product, Fiberglass Pipe Insulation.  "Sell Me This Pipe Insulation" would be asked to our customer service representatives and I am sure he would get some of the following fundamental selling points:

  • Our Fiberglass Pipe Insulation is 100% Made in America!
  • We have every pipe size in stock with wall thickness from 1/2" up to 3" thick!
  • We offer expertise advice since this is our main product we deal with year round.
  • We have some of the lowest pricing around and ship same or next day!
  • We don't just sell Fiberglass Pipe Insulation, we sell ALL of the materials you will need to complete your project.

Jordan Belfort would scoff at these answers and grab the piece of pipe insulation out of the sales rep's hands and pass it on to the next sales person.

The correct answer to the question would not be to ask him to write his name down on a piece of paper, but it would be very similar to the following:

  • Have you taken a good look at your Heating Bill? 
    • Natural Gas and Heating Oil Prices are around 30% higher than 2021!  Fiberglass Pipe Insulation improves your heating system's efficiency resulting in lower fuel use.
  • Does your Boiler seem to run Non-Stop all Winter long?
    • Fiberglass Pipe Insulation retains heat inside the pipe and limits heat loss in unconditioned spaces such as basements and craw spaces.  Boilers run for much longer when they struggle to get heat to the radiators.  This struggle occurs due to bare pipes radiating off heat in unconditioned spaces.  If your boiler is running too much, it not only burns through more fuel, it also reduces the lifespan of the unit.
  • Is your Basement the warmest area in your house?
    • If your basement is warmer than your upstairs you have a pipe insulation problem and that problem usually stems from having inadequate or no pipe insulation at all.  Un-insulated pipes in your basement act like radiators because they emit tons of heat that should be going upstairs.  A little bit of fiberglass pipe insulation will not only cut down on the excruciating temperatures in the basement but it will allow the heat to get to where it needs to be, your living areas.

If you can answer yes to any of the above three questions then I think you may need to buy our pen...err I mean pipe insulation.  And if you do need to buy pipe insulation please see our sales pitches listed above that made Mr. Belfort cringe.